And dating an older
Russell confesses he hasn't dated since 1989 and Jess replies, "That was the year I learned to use the toaster by myself." Not so hot.
A 30-year-old man from Brooklyn told me these factors are what makes older women a turn on. If she hasn’t tried it herself, she’s likely considered it.) starts talking to a girl in college who, he realizes, "doesn't know what is." For your date with an older gent: as cool as it is, not everyone needs to know that you were part of an NSYNC fan club (cough cough).But, seriously, if they ever do a reunion tour J is SO coming with me.“I find it comforting to know that her life goes on when I’m not around,” he said. Plus, I’m talking about outside of the bedroom as well. etc.) But many are not.** She’s choosier, and, unlike the 26-year-olds who think they’ll drop dead if they’re not engaged by 27, married at 28, and prego before 30, she’s looking at life a little differently now.(This is code for, “I dread clingy girls who abandon their own ships the moment we have sex, and set up camp on my shore.”) Also, the fact that an older woman has her own money means she likely worked hard to get it. You may buy into the idea that all older women are “desperate.” Granted, some are. This doesn’t mean she doesn’t want marriage/kids, because she might—but if so, she’ll be pretty clear about it up front.And, unlike the 23-year-old who gets tanked and throws shade at your ex, she’s got class. I once went out with a young man from Queens who only dated older women because younger ladies, he found, couldn’t do a thing without checking in with 15 of their friends.
In fact, your ex will likely friend her on FB (like my old bf’s ex-wife did). When you date a younger woman, he said, you also date all her friends, and it’s “a pain in the fucking ass.” You can’t just go out and do your own thing because she must receive approval from a larger governing body.
And I've added a couple of my own tips for good measure, since I am the younger woman and all.
But I've been watching and compiled a list of DOs and DON' Ts from Jess's experience dating the sophisticated Dermot Mulroney as Fancypants, who's a whopping twelve years older.
If she feels you are totally into learning about her that is a real turn on, especially if you have a sense of humor. Just like you don’t want someone to misrepresent themselves to you, don’t misrepresent to them. She will want to meet you in a public place and allow her to make arrangements to meet, mainly in her hood. If you can’t then text her and make a plan for another time. We know at this stage about not changing the other person but accepting them the way they are. If you have children, don’t be afraid of introducing her to them.
It’s uncomfortable for both, and there’s no way of having any kind of fun or spontaneous conversation. If the picture you have online is what she will see in person, don’t come walking in looking nothing like your photo, either being fifty pounds heavier, the photo was taken when you were twenty years younger.
When you make the initial contact if it is just for casual sex that you are interested in please be upfront about it to save time on both sides.